NO EXCUSES

So much of this year has been about getting back on track with taking care of myself and fostering my interests. Although college can be a time of great growth, it can also become totally overwhelming and pull one’s attention away from other important areas in life. Looking back on my experience in college, I can see how I neglected to build a solid foundation of self-love and care I could return to in times of stress. I put taking care of and appreciating myself last so I could get ahead, giving into the demands of constant worry and fear. The result is something I am still cleaning up to this day.

When I graduated in May, I thought it would be easy to get on top of these things. I would have more time for myself and I could finally pursue what’s truly important to me. However, life quickly challenged that notion, introducing me to the reality of the working world and adulthood. Although I half expected this to happen, I was still surprised and annoyed when it did. I guess I figured wishful thinking and denial could postpone adulthood while I got my sh*t together. But life continued to get busier and I kept making excuses to justify why I was waiting until after the stress ended to be happy and healthy. Continue reading “NO EXCUSES”

Advertisements

Forcing It

It’s quiet. A subtle presence has returned and everything that seemed unclear before now makes perfect sense. It’s Fall. Trees self destruct, shedding their leaves without worry just like I shed the disappointments of my past. I love this time of year.

I can never quite explain why I love Fall so much but how I feel emotionally during this season has a lot to do with it. Despite the fact that everything outside is dying, I feel new. It’s like a fresh start where what is truly important in my life is made obviously clear. This is all on top of the fact that it’s the unofficial kickoff to the holiday season, the coziest time of year, and the perfect time to buy new clothes.

This season has been interesting thus far. It’s my first Fall out of school and the lack of structured guidance has left me unstable. This is the first time in my life where the next step is not laid out for me and it’s… weird. Sometimes I look back on my time in school and wish I still had the same confidence and sense of direction without all the headaches that come along with getting a degree. Continue reading “Forcing It”